Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Life Is Like a Car Wash

Last year after our trip to Canada, my car (Simon) was buried in 2000 miles worth of bugs. It was more than the regular car wash could handle so I went to brand new the Fancy/Schmancy drive through car wash. A nice young lady took my money and directed me to drive around their sign...where she and another young lady wielded their wacky wands at full pressure.  It felt as if they might blow off the front grill. It was a little shocking.

While bracing myself from such a frontal attack, I felt something grab Simon's left front tire and start to suck us forward.  We had lost any control and into the vortex we went. I've never been in a drive-through car wash where you couldn't see the end as you went in the entrance, but this looked like a never-ending black hole.

We got sucked further and further through the cave and there were big things flying about everywhere. It made the wand girls seem tame. There was an assortment of huge flapping multi-colored brushes spewing multi-colored soaps. And the NOISE was incredible. Vertigo took over and I felt as if maybe we might crash into the ground somehow. Then motion sickness set in, and it was quite a terrifying few minutes.

Though I had never heard of a news report about anyone trapped inside a car wash, that thought did pass through my mind. Headline--"Elderly Woman Stranded in Wild Car Wash; Jaws of Life Needed".

Finally, the light appeared and the tsumani disappeared.  With heart pounding like being chased by The Thing, I peeled out of there like a bat out of Clifton. It probably took five years off the life of my tires' warranty.

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